Office– Office: Leave

If you ever had a boss went red when he/she saw anything more than 2 days leave approval, then you need to read this. 

A recent survey revealed that Singaporeans can't take time off from work due to professional pressures. My better half says this is true for India as well. Look around your office and you will seldom find well rested, genuinely enthusiastic, straight talking, non-bitching colleagues. The reason – No leave.  A colleague in the HR department says the company pays people for all the leave they are eligible to encash and apparently it is a very significant amount.

Not availing leave impacts physical and mental health, does not make business sense, and is not cool. Why then do bosses hate to give or take leave?

It stems from the fact that traditionally, taking leave made you a sissy. Don't you remember that "Weak" kid in school who kept taking leave due to ill health? (Never mind that he joined IIT and then Harvard and now lives in a funky mansion in Silicon Valley with a good looking wife and all rounder -kids).  What did your daddy say about that "hen-pecked" husband who took leave because he had to do the laundry and occasionally cooking too? (Never mind the scourge your daddy has is because he can't even make his own coffee leave alone iron his shirts). And that lady in the office, who keeps "making excuses" saying "I need time off to spend with my child?" What a joke! If she wanted to spend time, then why come to office? She's better off staying home permanently….

Leave is associated with being frivolous and unimpressively so.  Work shirker, lazy, incompetent, irresponsible, timid, are other adjectives associated with leave. No one wants a subordinate, or boss with such a reputation.

Conversely, if you want to build up a reputation in corporate India, you start with a "no leave or leave for good" policy. That way you are on top of the mind recall, even if it is a negative association (after all any publicity is good publicity).  The minute you start rejecting those 3 day leave applications, you become legendary.  When you cut short a 2 day leave, you become revered. When you scoff at that one day leave, your subordinate feels embarrassed. And when you raise your eye brows at that half a day leave, your subordinate ends up working overtime for a while week in penance.

The only instance where a longish leave is tolerated is when someone is either getting married or a parent has died or if you are having a baby (sadly, many men and many companies do not know what paternity is. One even asked me if that was a kind of law suit). That is promptly rewarded with increased work once you return. Little wonder then why most women do not come back post marriage or child birth and many men move jobs around the same time.

How to retain your sanity? But a smart phone and stay connected with the happening crowd. Put the ring tones on high volume during meetings and let the phone scream in glee. Keep a ready set of jokes on your browser and laugh/ cry/ weep aloud in your seat. When others look at you, put your head down in remorse.  Have your lunch in solitude and pretend to speak to yourself. Very soon the boss will conclude that you indeed deserve a leave.

Office- Office: Perception Management, the Ramu Kaka Way

The other day the wide eyed wonder was found with eyes red. Apparently her boss felt she was not doing any work and “I work like a bloody donkey 14 hours a day”, she sobbed. What do you do when trapped with perception management issues? Look inwards – I mean look within the confines of your house and see that hard worker who adds the extra shine to your floors. Your domestic help.


You might hate your servant, but you still won’t dismiss him/her. They take a month off without notice leaving you gritting your teeth and awaiting their return. Their work is always found wanting. They ask for a raise, old clothes/ shoes/bags, “chai paani”, medicines, salary in advance, new clothes and all you can do is give into their demands.

There is no better representation of perception management. Put yourself in the humble servant’s shoes and imagine the control you can have over your boss! To get there, just follow these three rules:

1. Be humble: It gives people an illusion of control over you. Eventually an intangible bond builds up and your boss can never dare to shriek “WHAT KIND OF SHODDY WORK HAVE YOU DONE?”. They will think it is rude.

2. The 80:20 rule: Do 80% of your work putting in only 20% of your efforts. Save the bulk of your talent for the evasive 20% of quality work. (Wondered why servants put in their best before the festival season? So they can avail a pay rise, leave and new clothes..)

3. Never mind your own business: The employee who prospers, is the one whose eyes are wandering and ears de-waxed. Every boss loves to hear gossip if packaged appropriately. Gossip tops the do-do-list. (After all don’t you overlook the dirt under the bed in exchange for knowing which TV Mr. Khanna has purchased or where the Reddys are vacationing this year or how the flat secretary Pandey came drunk one evening…..?)

As for the wide eyed wonder, she has decided to re-instate both her servants.